


star crossed lovers

by odetoptg



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M, Pentagon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:02:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 23,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22843735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/odetoptg/pseuds/odetoptg
Summary: yang hongseok just wanted a little time away.adachi yuto was looking for a way out.neither of them suspected a little stargazing would bring them such a new awakening.
Relationships: Adachi Yuto/Yang Hongseok
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	1. hongseok

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys! this is my first work here, and I hope it isn't too poorly written. I haven't written anything in a while so it feels a little strange to be back to it and this might not be my best, but I like the idea. I hope you all enjoy!

Hongseok scrolled through an Instagram page that he didn’t even want to make in the first place. The only reason he did was because his older brother, Jun, insisted that it would make him look one hundred percent better with the girls that thirsted him. They complimented him left and right, throwing themselves at him, and he didn't like it. They would message him, DM him, try so hard to get him to like him, but that wasn't who Hongseok was. Jun didn’t quite understand that Hongseok didn’t like these women. He didn’t look at them the same way they looked at him. However, Hongseok wasn’t much of a confrontational person, so he left it alone. He just let them think what they wanted about him. He let them say whatever they wanted to. He never even said anything, just shrugging it off, but he would be lying if he said it didn’t bother him. He didn’t understand what these girls saw in him. He was a nice guy, sure, but they didn’t see that. They only saw him for his body and his looks. He worked out and got into shape to build his confidence from his younger years, being quite puny before. He just wanted to feel good about himself. He didn’t think it would come with this unsolicited attention from every girl that he went to school with before. He had graduated already, yet they still kept their attention on him. He knew he should just delete his Instagram, block everyone he knew from before, and stop taking his brother’s advice; but he couldn’t. He didn’t know how. He thought that it would be stupid and silly, so he just closed out of the app and went on with his day, unbothered. 

He didn’t have a terrible life. He had a great family who were pretty close knit, his brother was probably his best friend, his mother was supportive and loved him unconditionally, and his father was a bit harder on him. His father wasn’t a cold or strict man, he just wanted to see his son succeed. But thus far in his life, he hasn’t exactly done that and he could feel his father distancing himself from him. Besides that, his family was great. His social life wasn’t so much. He didn’t feel as though he had any real friends, except his closest friend, Ko Shinwon. They were a surprising duo, but he had always liked being around him and being in his company. They were similar and different all at once, and that excited him. He liked hanging out with Shinwon, but recently, he has been busy with God knows what, so Hongseok has felt pretty lonely. His brother always joked about Hongseok and Shinwon being gay for one another, Hongseok just brushing the thought away with a laugh. His brother was right about one thing though; and that was that he was gay.

Hongseok hadn’t come to terms with this reality until recently. He never wanted to think he was gay because not only would his family not accept him, but he didn’t want to accept it himself. He hadn’t thought about girls in a romantic or sexual way in a long time, so it was only natural to assume he was gay. He juggled with the idea that he might be aromantic, asexual, but that wasn’t the case. After months, almost years, of battling with these thoughts, he let himself free and told himself he was gay. He had always longed to know what it was like to have a true connection with a guy who understood him, who would open up to him, be truthful, have chemistry with someone. He had a couple flings here and there with guys, and he enjoyed those, he enjoyed the thrill of what seemed forbidden by making love with a man, but he also wanted something deeper. He knew that he was only twenty two, and had plenty more life to live ahead of him, but he felt trapped. He felt trapped inside his own body and mind, longing for another man to come and show him what a real connection was. He didn’t feel like he had a real connection with anyone emotionally, physically, or mentally: not even his own family. He needed an escape but he didn’t know where to go or what to do. There were so many thoughts running through his head, he didn’t even realize his brother had come back to talk to him. 

“Hongseok, hello?” Jun asked, quite annoyed at his brother’s attention span that was shorter than he remembered, smacking Hongseok’s arm. He groaned and came back to whatever his brother had said before, raising an eyebrow questioningly at him. 

“I asked if you wanted to go to the gym with me. I know you haven’t gone in a couple of days and I thought I would ask before I head out.” Hongseok sighed as he thought about it. He wanted to go, but he knew there would be people there who would come up to him, mainly the same girls that would hang out there all the time just to watch him workout. It was creepy and he didn’t want people staring at him while he was trying to lift weights, so he shook his head. 

“No, I think I will pass. I was going to go tomorrow morning kind of early before I head out. I think I am going to stay here, I was working on something anyways.” Jun nodded, sighing a bit at how his brother turned down his offer, but he shrugged and walked out the front door without another word. 

As he sat on his bed, running a song he had been working on through his head, a thought came to him. He wasn’t sure why, but he felt like he needed to get away. He felt like he needed to go out somewhere and be alone. He wasn’t sure what he needed to get away from. Maybe he needed to get away from his brother’s teasing and annoying comments about everything in his life. Maybe he needed to get away from his mother’s smothering. Maybe he needed to get away from his father’s constant nagging him to go out and get an education. He thought most of all what he needed though, was some alone time to get himself in check and get his mind right. He couldn’t do that here, especially when every time he left his house, he was worried he would have an unsolicited visitor somewhere. He wasn’t rude, but they were, and he needed a break. It was quite annoying and he didn’t understand. There were plenty of other built, muscular men in this city, his brother included; why did they only want to ogle him? He shook his head and tried to clear all of those thoughts away. He needed to think of where he could go, what he could do for a couple of days to give himself some space. He knew he couldn’t stay here in the city anywhere, because much like his life, there would be no change of tempo or scenery, so that was out of the question. He thought about where he had gone before in his life, even researching some places that weren’t too far out of zone, but far enough away that he would get some much needed space. 

He set on a short road trip, trying to find the perfect place to stay. He didn’t exactly have a load of cash on him, so he needed to remember that. He could’ve asked his parents for money, but he didn’t like that narrative, so he never did. He had a job anyways, so he had enough. After driving around, stopping, checking places out, he was tired and felt like he needed to go back home. On his way back, he stopped one more time. He decided to go a little deeper into his search since the sun was going down and this would be his last destination for the night. After walking for about ten minutes, he comes to a beautiful overlook. He didn’t know how in the world something so beautiful was here, but he was astonished. He felt it immediately, right there in his heart, this was going to be his spot. The scenery was incredulous, it could have brought him to tears. It was an image out of a fairy garden, and nothing less than such. There were trees everywhere, all blooming with some kind of flowers that must stay strong throughout the summer since it was June. There were other plants that surrounded the overlook, almost like a border, a frame. The overlook itself was astonishing as well. The view wasn’t grand in size, but it was high enough to be considered an overlook. Below was a small little city that had a river running through, the sunlight reflecting off the water to make a shine like no other. He knew this was it. He took note of where it was, and drove back home. 

Arriving home, he skipped out on dinner with his family, wanting to prepare as soon as possible. He also heard his father say some not so encouraging things about him to his mother at the table, and he didn’t respect that. He ignored the comments and calls of his name and walked up the stairs to gather his things and what all he might need. He had never actually been on a camping trip, let alone planned to stay out there for days on end. He wasn’t sure what you needed, or how you even did anything. He probably should have planned better, but he didn’t care. He would survive. He started to make a long list of what possible things he would need. After what seemed like forever planning, he had everything figured out and was on his way to starting his preparation. He needed a bit of help from his brother though, and that part, he was worried about. 

“Hey Jun, can I talk to you for a second?” His brother turned from his computer desk and nodded. 

“Sure, what’s up?” He asked with a simple gesture for his brother to come in. 

“I don’t want to waste your time and I don’t want to waste my own time. I am going camping for a couple days by myself somewhere. I need some space and some air and what better way than camping. Anyways, I have everything set and packed up, but I was wondering if I could use your truck? My car wouldn’t really do well to get where I am trying to go. I won’t be gone too long, though, a week tops.” 

His brother had both a look of confusion and amusement on his face as he listened to his brother’s announcement and request. Hongseok knew that look all too well and just sighed. 

“Look, I don’t want to sit here and explain myself to you. Can I use your truck or not?” Hongseok huffed in annoyance, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Where are you even going? If it somewhere super far away, or somewhere you’re going to fuck my truck up, then no. But if it isn’t too far and you swear on your life you aren’t going to do anything to it, then sure. I don’t mind driving your crumby little car for a week if you really need this.” He paused after saying that, getting serious for a moment. “Why do you need this?” He asked in a tone that Hongseok wasn’t sure he had ever heard coming from his brother so quickly. Jun wasn’t one to be serious most of the time, especially with Hongseok. It caused Hongseok to shake a bit, but he held himself together. He couldn’t let his brother see him that way. He shrugged and ran a hand through his hair. 

“We all need to get away sometimes, right? To de-stress?” He didn’t know what else to say, not wanting to get too talkative about his issues within his family, his friends, his social life, and his sexuality most of all. 

Jun knew better than to try and push Hongseok if something really was wrong, so he just sighed and nodded. “Fair enough. Just be careful and don’t fuck my truck up.” Hongseok nodded and was about to leave the room before he stopped. 

“What should I tell mom and dad?” He asked, chewing on his lip. He knew that if he told his mother, she would be overly-protective and try and talk him out of it, talk him into staying because it was dangerous out there all alone. He knew his father would call him a coward who was just running away from his problems instead of taking them head on. His father wouldn’t be wrong, but he had enough shit for one time so he just needed a break. 

Jun thought about his brother’s question, running a hand across his slightly overgrown beard that no one liked except his girlfriend, which was why he still kept it. Hongseok thought it was ugly, but his beard was the last thing on his mind right now. Finally, after what felt like a millennium of standing in silence waiting for his brother, he spoke up. 

“Why don’t you tell them you’re going to stay with your friend, ah, what’s his name? That Shinwon guy? They only met him a couple times and probably wouldn’t call you out or ask too many questions. You haven’t seen him in a while. Just tell them you missed him and were going to spend time with him.” Hongseok smiles at his brother’s suggestion and nods. 

He walks out of his brother’s room, spending the rest of the night packing up for his trip. He packs some clothes, some blankets, some pillows, a tent to sleep in, food, water, everything else he might need. He loaded up his brother’s truck the night before he planned to leave so his parents wouldn’t get too suspicious. That wouldn’t fit his story, anyways. Once he was packed up, he sighed happily at the thought of being able to finally go out and have some well deserved alone time. His parents wanted to have lunch with Hongseok and Jun the next afternoon, and everything seemed to be going well, until Hongseok’s father started talking about his future. 

“Hongseok, when are you going to go out and get a real job instead of working at the crumby pizza place that looks like something from a horror movie? You graduated so high in your class, all A’s, scholar list, star athlete it seemed. You had a full ride to three colleges that you would have excelled at and been set for four years. Yet, you insisted on working in a pizza place instead of all of that?” Hongseok’s father scoffed at the mere thought, his mother giving her husband a piercing glare, smiling apologetically to Hongseok. He didn’t say anything for a moment, not wanting this conversation with his father. 

“I wasn’t ready to go to college. I needed to get my life sorted out before I could-” And like clockwork, he was cut off by his father. 

“Get your life together? What part of your life have you gotten together so far? Hm? You still live at home with your parents, you work at a nasty pizza place making sub-par pizzas, the only friend you have is a weird boy who is scared of dogs and your brother, and you don’t even have any hobbies except working out. Do you even have a plan in life or do you plan to mooch off your parents for the rest of your life?” Hongseok was angry now, fuming almost, but he kept his mouth shut. He didn’t want to start anything more with his father, and he didn’t want to upset his mother. He knew things would get worse and he didn’t want to leave on a bad note, especially since his mother would be stuck here with him. His father chuckled, shaking his head when Hongseok didn’t respond. “Of course you didn’t respond. Why would you? You’re weak.” Hongseok gripped his fork as tightly as possible, his knuckles turning white. His father got up and just walked to his bedroom, leaving Hongseok, Jun, and their mother. 

“Hongseok, I am sorry your father is in such a terrible mood lately. I know he means well he just, he wants to see you try a little harder is all.” He couldn’t be mad at his mother, but he knew she was just buying into it all anyways. Hongseok shook his head and shrugged. 

“He is always in a terrible mood, but that’s okay. Just fueling more of my fire to leave. I am going to stay with my weird little friend who is scared of dogs for a while." He says sarcastically, "I haven’t seen him in a couple weeks and I think I need some space so.” His mother sighed, not wanting him to go, but she nodded understandingly. She got up and went to talk with her husband. Hongseok turned to Jun, Jun looked at him, and there was just some unspoken feeling with one another. 

“I am going to leave early in the morning, so I probably won’t see you for a while. Thanks for letting me use the truck, and I hope things with that asshole don’t get too bad while I am gone. I can’t imagine they would though, they will probably be better. Anyways, thanks, love you bro.” Hongseok walks out of the room before Jun even gets a chance to say what he wants to him. 

Hongseok falls asleep instantly, but he starts to have dreams that are unexplained and he is a bit worried about them. He had never had a dream that felt so real, that felt like he was falling. He felt like he had jumped off the top of a building and was free falling, but forever. He wasn’t sure what was happening, why he was dreaming it, or why he couldn’t wake himself up. Finally, he hit the ground and his whole world seemed different. The most unusual part about it, was he landed beside a boy he had never seen before, who looked to be in the same situation as him. He looked to be around his age, tall, handsome, a look that made you wonder, a mysterious aura, but before he could question it, he was jolting awake at his alarm that he quickly turned off. He got up, doing one last sweep before getting into his brother’s truck and driving off to his spot, praying no one had found it and taken it over. 

It didn’t seem to take as long to get there as before, but driving through the woods with his brother’s truck was definitely a challenge. He wasn’t sure why, but something didn’t feel right. He just ignored it, wanting to be able to relax and not think about a thing that had been stressing him out. He needed to relax. When he got to his spot, he parked his truck and began to set everything the way he wanted it to be. Luckily for him, to be June, it was rather temperate that day, not being too hot or cold, it was a perfect day for this. It took him a couple hours to get his tent set up, never have done it before, and it was nice. He sat down and relaxed, letting his mind go blank for a while. The sun had started to set, and he found himself curious as to what the sunset would look like at the overlook he had seen earlier. His campsite wasn’t too far away, so he walked to it, deciding to do a little sunset watching and stargazing, not aware at all about what he was going to find there later.


	2. yuto

“Yuto-yah.” The young girl’s voice was so soft against his own ear and he groaned. He couldn’t make heads or tails of where the voice was coming from. He didn’t even know if it was real or if it was all in his head. He thought maybe he was dreaming and hearing things. When he stirred in his sleep, he slowly opened his eyes, jumping at the face less than an inch from his own. 

He groaned, still nestled in all of his sleep-filled confusion. He didn’t want to answer, unsure of if he was awake, and knowing that his dreams have played tricks on him before. After a moment, he finally opened his eyes and saw his older sister standing right in front of him. She was dirty, in fact covered in more mud than he had ever seen, so he was nervous something bad happened. He shot up and looked over her body quickly, sighing a bit. “Akari?” 

She just shook her a bit and sighed shakily. “Shh… don’t let her hear you.” She whispers, his older sister’s voice more shaky than he had ever heard it before. She grabbed his hand and pulled him up from the bed. “Hurry, put your jacket on and come with me.” He was so nervous now, his sister wasn’t telling him anything, and she seemed scared out of her mind. He couldn’t tell what was wrong, but by her hushed tone and her rushing him to follow her, he knew now wasn’t the best time to ask. 

Once he had gotten his jacket and shoes on, he was yanked out of his bedroom, pushed through the front door or their parents small home, and she ran with him out to their barn, taking quick shelter just long enough for her to tell him what was going on. “Akari, hey calm down, what’s going on?” He asked immediately, still in a hushed whisper until he knew that he could speak a bit louder. She didn’t say anything for a moment, just staring at her brother in fear. “Akari…” He whispers, taking her hands, “What is wrong?” She finally calms down and sighs. He knew that his sister was a very emotional girl, and it was hard for her to calm down when things got serious, but this was a whole new level. 

After what seemed like forever, she finally stopped crying and shaking and looked at her brother with a serious undertone in her eyes. “Mom is trying to kill me.” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Was she being serious? Was she playing a joke on him? He had a dumbfounded look on his face, unsure of what to say. All he could choke out was, “What?” She started to cry all over again and didn’t think she could calm down. “She is trying to kill me…. I messed something up, she beat me up.. she dragged me through the mud.. I don’t know.. I didn’t mean to.. I just…” She paused and closed her eyes. “We have to get out of here, she is coming for you next. You know she already.. You know, hates you.” She mumbled. 

Yuto couldn’t believe what he was hearing. How could his mother be so cruel? He knew that his mother hated him, but he didn’t think his mother had such hatred for his sister. His sister was an amazing woman, she always did right by people, helped everyone she possibly could. He just couldn’t understand. But he had to get his head on straight to help his sister in any way he could. He pulled her into his arms and stroked her hair. He wanted to ask what his mother had done, what she had done, and where she was. But he didn’t have time. “I have an idea, come on.” He stood up, checking around to see if his mother was anywhere in sight. He didn’t see her, but he knew she was hiding out somewhere out there. He had to work quickly. “Here, get on my back. You’re too shaky to be running.” Akari didn’t want to protest, so she hopped on her brother’s back, wrapping her arms around his neck and he started walking quickly, running almost. 

After running off their family farm, he felt that his mother wouldn’t catch up to them for a while, so he put his sister down. “Listen, I know you won’t like the idea, but it needs to be done. If she is on this crazy rampage, you need to stay away. My friend Wooseok owes me a favor, alright? I am going to ask if you can stay with him and his sister. I promise that I will solve this, okay? Please do this for me and don’t argue with me on this. They will take care of you for a couple of days.” She sighed, giving her brother a pointed look, not wanting to do this, but rather feel like a bit of a burden than be attacked by her mother again.  
He walked the rest of the way to his friend Wooseok’s house, knocking on the door and hoping he was home. He knew it was still early, and he did feel bad for waking him, but it was an emergency. Wooseok came to the door a second later, hand rubbing at his eyes as he looked at the scene in front of him. He smiled a bit at Akari and nodded at Yuto. “Hey guys, what are you doing here so early?” He questions with a pointed look. 

“Wooseok, I know this is sudden and super on the spot, and I hate to ask, but I really need your help. Our mom is kind of off the wall and my sister needs somewhere to stay for a day or two, maybe a little longer depending on what I can do. I hate to ask, I really do, but could you please take her in?” Yuto had a pleading look in his eyes, knowing that he needed to handle this situation immediately and he didn’t want his sister to have to go through anything else. She was too good, too sweet, too pure for any of that. 

Wooseok didn’t know what the family emergency was, what his mother was actually doing, but he had known Yuto for a long time. He knew Yuto for the last 5 years, knowing he was a good person. He wouldn’t lie about any of this or try and take advantage. He didn’t know Akari very well, but he knew she was a good person. After a moment of thought, he nodded and gave a gentle smile. “Of course, she is welcomed anytime and can stay for as long as you need. My sister would love to have some company.” He says softly. Akari smiles shakily and thanks him. Yuto thanks Wooseok before hugging Akari. “I love you, okay? I will see you later. I am going to go take care of our problem.” Yuto kisses her forehead and thanks Wooseok once again before walking off to their house to find and confront their mother. 

On his walk back, he thought about what he was going to do. He didn’t know how to approach the situation. His mother was a very violent woman, with a temper like no other and he didn’t know if he would be able to talk with her about it. He feared that all he was going to get in return was a beating, but if that took it away from Akari, he would do that for her. He wasn’t her older brother, but he still protected her like he was. He had to; with their father gone, and their mother being so terrible, he had to shield her. He had done a good job thus far, keeping her safe from their mother’s wrath, but he couldn’t this time and it broke his heart. He was furious actually. His sister hadn’t told him the extent of what happened, but the amount of dirt, scratches, bruises, and fingerprints around her neck, he knew his mother wasn’t easy on her. He was fuming, so when he got to his family farm, he wasted no time in trying to find his mother.  
When he found her, she was in their kitchen, humming like nothing happened. He knew that was her defense, to make it look like she was in a good mood, ready to strike any moment. Before he could even say anything, it was like his mother knew he was there. “Where is your sister?” She asked with a bit of an annoyed tone, “I need her to come and fix everything she messed up today.” She said it so calmly, that it made Yuto even more angry. He couldn’t believe she was acting like that, and he wasted no time in this game his mother wanted to play. 

“What the hell did you do to Akari? What did she do that was so bad you felt the need to beat her half to death and scare her for her life?” He says seriously, to which his mother chuckles. “Aww look at you? Are you jealous it wasn’t you getting beaten? I thought you would appreciate my break from you. Besides, she let one of the pigs go and it ran off. We need that, you know. I made her chase it, but she couldn’t keep up, and she cried and cried like a little baby. I told her she would have to pay for it, and so I did what I had to do.” His mother’s words flew out of her mouth like fire, each word burning Yuto to his core. All he wanted to do was give his mother the same treatment, but he would never stoop to her level; never would he lay his hands on a woman, even if she deserved it. 

“Are you fucking serious? You beat her half to death because one of the pigs got out and she couldn’t catch it? You know she is sick, you know she isn’t as strong as she used to be. You know that. And so instead of just trying to help her catch the pig, you beat her that badly? What the fuck is wrong with you? She has been nothing but good to you, doing everything you ask of her and then some, she puts up with your anger and attitude and this is what you do to her? If you have a problem, take it out on me. I can take it. I can handle it. She can’t. She is a good person, and I don’t know who she got it from.” He spat back at her with the same intensity, but much more anger and hatred. He hated his mother, and he didn’t know how she could ever be this way. He knew it was because she was bitter and hated her own life, so she made theirs a living hell as well. “I hope she stays away. She has someone to go, people who would take her in a heartbeat, I hope she does. Why would she stay here with such a horrible, terrible mother?”  
She glared at him, with venom spewing just through her look itself. He knew what was coming. He knew she was going to make him pay for what he just said. Maybe she wouldn’t. But she would, she always did. She stepped closer to him, causing him to take a step back. A few more steps, and he was pushed against the small kitchen table. She got in his face and smirked. “When did you get so brave? My little yuto? Who do you think you are to talk to me like that? Me, that has taken care of you all the time, taken care of you and your sister? Where do you think you will go? Where do either of you think you will be without me, huh?” His mother gripped his neck tightly, already starting her assault. She squeezed until he was fighting to breathe, then threw him into the ground, his head not missing the corner of the kitchen table. He was already lightheaded, and he felt like he couldn’t see. “You should have just kept your mouth shut, sweet pea.” She says, spitting pure hatred at him. He knew he should have. 

His mother took no mercy on Yuto. She beat him until he couldn’t breathe. She choked him out more times than ever, he was barely on the brink of consciousness. She had hit him so many times, his body was weak, he has bruises covering his entire body, slashes and gashes from her nails and whatever else. He had lost count of how many times she had hit him, how many times his body rejected the blow, and how many times he almost passed out. But she wouldn’t let him, she wanted him to see and feel every single hit that he took to his body. After he was barely awake, on the brink of passing out, she smiled evilly at him, brushing her hand along his cheek and lips that were now bloody and swollen. “Maybe next time, you’ll keep your mouth shut.” She whispers, patting his cheek before getting up and giving him one last kick. “Now, get out.” She spat.  
It took him a while to actually be able to get up, but he did, and he had plans of never coming back. He had no good memories here on this farm. There was only one with his late father and his sister. That was it. Ever since his father died, it has been a living hell for Akari and himself. He felt terrible for her sister, she was too pure and too kind to be here and deserve this kind of treatment. His mother was a monster, and he wished that they had someone else to turn to during this time, but they didn’t. All they had was Wooseok and he knew that he would be forever grateful for his best friend. He wanted to go back to Wooseok’s house to get Akari, but he knew she would freak out and feel terrible, thinking it was her fault, if she saw him in this condition, so he decided not to go back there right this second. He walked down to a little creek in the woods by where he lived, washing himself off. He got all of the blood and dirt from his face, neck, and anywhere else it was. He knew that he looked a mess. He knew that he looked awful and that he would for a long time. He was thankful he still had his jacket because it was much easier to hide everything that had happened to him. 

He sat down by the creek, putting his head in his hands, thinking what gone wrong in his past life to ever have this happen to him or his sister. They were good people, so why did they get stuck with such an awful mother? Yuto wasn’t religious, but he thought maybe God really did hate him. Maybe this was God’s way of punishing him for things he had done. Maybe this was a way of punishing him for his impure thoughts. Yuto knew that might have been in. Yuto wasn’t gay, no he would never admit that, but he knew that he had thoughts. Just the fact of him questioning it made him nervous. He didn’t think he was gay, but he knew he didn’t like girls in that way either. Maybe he didn’t like anyone, but why else would he have these thoughts if not? This had to be some kind of joke. Maybe he really was getting punished, he just didn’t understand why his sister would be dragged into it. She was an angel, and he would never understand. He hoped that she could get out of this situation, maybe she already was and he prayed that was the case. Maybe she would stay with Wooseok, maybe he could stay with Wooseok. No, he couldn’t mooch off of his best friend, even if he said it was okay. Yuto shook those thoughts away, not wanting to get too caught up in his own thoughts. He didn’t know what to do. All he knew, was he needed some time away. 

After calling Wooseok to tell him he wouldn’t be back until morning, and to tell Akari not to worry and their problem was taken care of, he decided to just go on a walk. He knew that he didn’t want to be seen, so he covered up the best he could and started walking. His journey went on for hours it seemed, and it had. He walked for almost four hours, but he walked in one big circle. He didn’t get too far and seemed as though he ended up in the same spot. His mind was running rampant and he realized the sun was starting to go down. He glanced up and noticed a small walkway, that he thought maybe led to somewhere interesting. He was already beaten half to death today, so he wasn’t too scared. He was so immersed in his thoughts about what he and his sister would do, but more for her. He was always more worried about her. She couldn’t survive on her own, not right now. She needed help. She needed someone to be with her, and even if that wasn’t him, as long as it was someone. Yuto tried to clear his mind, walking further up the trail, and stopping when he saw something he wasn’t expecting.


	3. the meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "the stars aligned, putting you here with me."

Yuto paused when he saw the man sitting there. He looked to be around Yuto’s age, but maybe a little older. He was unsure about what he was doing out here at this hour. It was about to get dark, the sun was starting to go down. Yuto had to admit, the boy sitting there looked stunning. He looked to be much more muscular, looking as though he worked out a lot. His skin was a glossy honey color, tanned perfectly. His hair looked soft, both red highlights and brown that was mostly natural. It suited him quite well, and he caught himself staring. He didn’t know why, but he couldn’t look away. The sunset was giving whoever this man was the perfect look, and he couldn’t help himself but to blush at the way he was staring. “You don’t like guys” kept ringing in his head over and over, trying to keep control of himself. He closed his eyes for a moment, but they immediately shot back open when he heard the boy singing in front of him. 

His voice matched his skin; soft and like honey. It hit Yuto’s soul without a hint and he didn’t know how to feel. He leaned against one of the nearest trees as he listened to his voice ring through the small area of the forest, praying no one else was around. This man’s voice was so smooth and it was so incredible to be able to listen to him. He did feel creepy just standing there, listening to this man sing, ogling him from the background. He thought about leaving, to turn around and just walk away, but he was so immersed in this man and his voice, that he didn’t quite know what to do. He stood there for about another minute, just listening to this wonderful voice, letting himself drown in the music of this stranger. 

Hongseok wanted to watch the sunset tonight, sit there as the stars began to come out. That gave him peace. That made him truly feel at peace, to find solace, and that was what he needed. He needed this comfort to guide him through this phase of his emotions that were dragging him in every direction possible. He was upset, he was angry, he was jealous, he was happy to be alone, but he was lonely. He didn’t know what emotion to feel and he knew that it was going to drive him crazy if he didn’t do something to relax. He went to that overlook, taking a seat on one of the rocks not too far from the edge of the hill. He knew that he wanted to just relax. He leaned back on the rock, closing his eyes for a brief moment, the warm air around him, soaking it up. He smiled and sighed, opening his eyes and looking out at the sunshine. He felt at peace now. He wanted to draw the scene in front of him, he wanted to capture the moment, but he left his phone back at the campsite and his notebook too, so he would just have to remember it from his memory. 

He felt that someone was watching him. He could feel eyes on him and he wasn’t sure if he was just paranoid because he was in the woods. The woods weren’t exactly the most perfect place to be alone, especially when night was coming. Hongseok wasn’t scared of course, but he knew there could still be dangerous people. He would just keep his guard up and hope for the best. He didn’t hear anything for a while, so he just smiled and let himself relax. Hongseok knew that even if someone was around, they would have done something by now. He shook the thought away, thinking of if he wanted to get up and leave. No, he was going to stay and watch the sunset like he said he was going to. He was going to stay and watch the stars, that was something that gave him peace. He closed his eyes again, letting himself get immersed into song once again. 

“I’m going under and this time I feel there’s no one to save me,  
This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy.  
I need somebody to heal, somebody to know, somebody to have, somebody to hold,   
It’s easy to say, but it’s never the same, I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain.  
Now the day bleeds, into nightfall, and nobody’s here to get me through it all,   
I let my guard down, and then you pulled the rug, I was getting kind of used to being someone you love.” 

Hongseok sang the words slowly, the slow song one that he had quickly come to love. He didn’t know why he loved it so much. He had never been in a serious relationship, so perhaps it was his longing that drew him to this song. He was never loved by someone long enough to feel the sting of a bad break-up, and he didn’t know if that was a good thing or not. He sang the lyrics, and as he did, the sting in his heart, the longing in his soul just got heavier. He wanted to find someone who would love him the way he wanted them to, to feel that sincere love from someone who only felt it for him. They would love him for himself, not for his body and not for his looks, not just for his body and the way he had sex. He wanted someone to care about him, to love him, and to help him find his inner happiness. He sighed at the thought, finishing up the song he was singing. He felt a bit more at peace, smiling as the sun was about to set along the horizon. He was excited to watch it set up here. He felt more relaxed, and watching the sunset really gave him solace that he so dearly needed. 

As much as Yuto wanted to stay, he felt he had been creepy enough and decided to leave this strange man alone with his thoughts, and his beautiful voice. He wanted to find the bravery to go to him and talk to him, but he couldn’t do it. He didn’t want to disturb him, plus, he was covered in scratches, bruises, and god knows what else. He wasn’t trying to make a bad impression or seem crazy, so, he turned around and started to walk away. But as he did, he stepped on a branch, cracking it, and almost tripping and falling. “Shit.” He muttered. Hongseok heard this and perked up, happy he stayed on guard. He looked around him and he happened to take a glance over by the treeline, seeing Yuto, who was holding onto a tree in front of him. 

“Hello? Who’s over there?” Hongseok called out, standing guard in case it was someone not so friendly. Yuto tensed up and froze when he heard his name being called. He was surprised to hear that the man’s voice didn’t sound too deep, or even angry, more curious than anything. Yuto didn’t know if he should keep going or if he should turn around. The man had already caught him out there, he didn’t know he had been watching and listening to him; creepy Yuto, creepy, he thought to himself. He sighed and finally decided to turn around, trying to hide his bit of nervousness. 

He walked back closer to the man, and as he got closer, he saw how much more beautiful he was up close. God Yuto, get a hold of yourself. You don’t even know this guy, and you’re not even gay. Calm down, and just go talk to him. “Are you lost?” Hongseok asked him lightly, to which Yuto shook his head no. “I was just out on a walk and I saw this overlook, but I didn’t want to disturb you.” He said quietly, voice shaking almost to the point where Hongseok couldn’t hear him. “Are you okay?” The younger boy looked as though he had seen a ghost, and as he walked closer, Hongseok could see he was beat up pretty badly. Yuto took one look at himself and sighed, biting his lip. “Yeah, don’t worry about me.” He shrugged and Hongseok nodded slightly. “Do you wanna come sit over here?” Yuto felt like the invitation may have been a bad idea, but he took it either way and walked to where Hongseok had been sitting, taking a seat beside him. 

“My name is Hongseok, by the way.” Yuto smiled a bit and cleared his throat the best he could although it hurt like hell.   
“I’m Yuto, nice to meet you. What are you doing all the way out here?”   
Hongseok shrugged, not sure what to tell this mysterious boy, covered in bruises and marks that he was oh so curious about, but he didn’t know this guy and didn’t want to overstep his boundaries in any way. 

“Everyone just needs some space every now and again, and I need mine. I came up here earlier, I am going to camp out for a couple of days.” He didn’t know why he was telling this man he didn’t know, that for all he knew could be some kind of serial killer, where he was staying. Smart move, Hongseok, so much for being on guard he thought to himself. Yuto nodded in understanding and smiled a little. 

“I was honestly just on a walk and came to check this place out. I didn’t think anyone would be up here, especially this late, but seeing as you’re camping out it makes sense.” The sun had almost set completely. The boys sat in silence for a few minutes watching it, taking in the natural beauty of the scene unraveling in front of them. They sat for about an hour, not sure why neither of them were saying a word. Maybe they didn’t need to. Maybe they just needed the company. Either way, here were two broken men, staring at the sky with one another, comfortable enough to not need words as the stars unfolded before them. It was beautiful. 

Hongseok and Yuto both didn’t know what was to come after this. They may not ever see each other again. Maybe they wouldn’t ever remember this moment. Maybe they would go on with their lives, never knowing who they were, never remembering this moment they were sharing now. It wasn’t emotional. It wasn’t memorable. It wasn’t anything they would relive. But it was the start of something. Both men felt comfortable. Both men felt at peace. Both men knew this was okay and that even though their lives weren’t the greatest, they could still find beauty in the little things like sunsets and stargazing.


	4. do you want to talk?

The night after Hongseok met Yuto, the world seemed to be in motion again, the world seemed to be okay, even if only for a few hours. He wasn’t sure what it was about this mysterious man that made him so likable and made Hongseok’s head spin with curiosity. He wanted to see him again, he wanted to see his nervous smile and watch the sun set and the stars come out to play in the night sky. He felt more at peace than he ever had at that moment, and he wanted to feel that again. He didn’t know why this mysterious and unknown man made him feel so at peace and so comfortable. He shouldn’t be feeling this way about someone like this. It made him feel so weird. He didn’t understand what was happening. He never felt like this about someone he didn’t even know; he didn’t feel like that about anyone. He really thought that he was going crazy. Maybe he just liked feeling like he had someone. Maybe he liked the idea of someone being beside him, who didn’t know his past or who he was, just comfortable sitting together. The stranger had nothing to judge him over, no prerequisite ideas of who Hongseok truly was. All he knew was that he was camping out and liked to watch sunsets. Maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing. 

His mind thought about this boy all day the next morning. He woke up early in the morning, right at sunrise, and smiled at the view. He didn’t want to waste too much of his day, so he put anything of value into Jun’s truck, locked in, and then grabbed a bag with some water, granola bars, his notebook, and his camera. He planned on taking a hike through the woods and up some trails. He loved going on hikes, he not only liked them for the view, but he enjoyed getting exercise in a different way than going to the gym and staying there all day with those cocky jerks who think they are the hot shit. That was the most annoying thing; all the guys who thought they were better than everyone else, smirking and trying to pick up girls at the gym. It did work sometimes, but he would never go so low as to do that, besides, he doesn’t even like women. He would much rather go out on a run, take a hike, anything other than going to the gym. After he had everything important locked up, he started on his way. 

He wasn’t sure exactly where he was going, but making sure to take note of where he had just come from. He took some pictures and marked where he was, just in case he started to get lost. He enjoyed the views, making sure to get as many pictures as he could. He loved photography, it was one of his many hidden passions. He never let anyone really see into what he liked hobby wise, because he was scared of what people thought of him. His whole life, he had to walk in the shadow of his heart-throb, muscular, lady-killer, tough guy brother, and he felt like he had to keep that up as he got older. He hated that he let himself fall into that mold; too bad he couldn’t be smart like his brother and do more so his father wouldn’t disown him. He shook the thought away and sighed. Either way, he loved photography, he loved art, and most of all, he loved stargazing. He planned on going to that overlook every night he was here. He wanted to look up at the stars, find the constellations, trace the stars, and most of all, wait to see if a certain someone would show up. 

He didn’t want to get his hopes up with Yuto. He didn’t want to think of him too highly because there was a fifty-fifty chance he might never see him again. Maybe he just came up there, saw Hongseok, and never wanted to come back. He knew that was silly, but it wasn’t like they had made a connection for the short amount of time they spent together last night. Hongseok could feel his hopes getting higher and higher of seeing this mysterious boy named Yuto. He hated that he was letting himself feel like this because he knew he needed to keep his guard up, but it felt like it was getting harder and harder to do that, especially because he was running through his mind. Of course it was starting to get dark when he first saw him hiding in the trees, but he could see his eyes shining through the shadow of the trees. They looked timid, shy, and hurt. But in a way, they still had a slight shimmer in them. His skin was rough, hands worn, clothes following suit, but he still had a gentleness to him. Hongseok didn’t miss the bruises, cuts, and other injuries that were on the man’s hands and neck, any exposed skin had something, and Hongseok could imagine there were more along his body. He felt terrible, but he didn’t want to overstep and ask him about them. Yuto would tell him if he wanted him to, and he would never push someone, especially if it was a sensitive matter. Hongseok really did hope that he would see Yuto again, even if it wasn’t tonight. 

Yuto wasn’t having the same feelings as Hongseok was. When he left that night, it was quickly, stumbling down the trail back to the street he had come from. He wasn’t sure why he got so frightened. He wasn’t scared of Hongseok. He seemed like an okay guy, he was beautiful, he had a great voice, but he didn’t know him. How could he trust him? The thing that scared Yuto the most though, was how beautiful he thought he was. He had so much trouble with his sexuality, that he still couldn’t accept it and wouldn’t accept it. He wasn’t gay, especially for this stranger, but he couldn’t say he wasn’t handsome. He didn’t like these thoughts, and assumed the only way to get away from them was to leave. Hongseok was a bit surprised at his sudden burst of energy to jump up from the rock, excusing himself to go home, and Yuto left without another word. He realized now that Hongseok probably thought he was crazy, but oh well. Yuto might never see him again anyways, so maybe it would all work out in the end. 

All Yuto wanted to do was go home, but he felt that he didn’t have a home anymore. He couldn’t go back to his mother, not after what she did to him. He didn’t want to go back to Wooseok and bother them, but he needed to see Akari. He knew she was going to have a fit and cry her eyes out when she saw him, but he couldn’t sleep outside. He needed to check up on her, anyways. He sighed as he walked the rest of the way through the woods, taking his time to get back to Wooseok’s house. He wanted to stall as much as he possibly could, hoping maybe Akari was sleeping and he wouldn’t have to face her until tomorrow. But he had no such luck. As he knocked on the door, he heard her voice behind it. Wooseok opened it, immediately grimacing at the sight of his best friend in front of him. He didn’t say anything, just letting him come inside. As soon as Akari saw him, her eyes widened and she felt her heart drop. She didn’t even see the whole of it and she was already tearing up. “Yuto..” He shook his head, just shushing her for the moment. “Akari, it’s okay. It isn’t that bad.” He mumbled, a bit of a broken tone in his voice that his sister knew all too well. She grabbed his hand and took him back to the room that Wooseok was letting them stay in. Yuto sighed as his sister practically begged him to show her the severity of it. He didn’t want to, knowing she was going to possibly break down, but he knew she wouldn’t stop until she saw. He gave in and stripped down to show her, leaving only his boxer shorts on. This wasn’t unnatural for them, so it wasn’t a big deal. She took one look at his body, littered in bruises, cuts, scratches, welts, anything you could think of. She immediately tensed up and all she could do was let her tears fall, hugging her brother tightly. 

“You’re an idiot, you know that right?” She mumbles.  
“Yeah, maybe so. But I wasn’t going to let her gang up on you and hurt you. You don’t deserve that.” Yuto says quietly, not meeting her gaze.  
“Yuto… neither do you.” She whispers and just hugs her brother tighter. No more words were exchanged between the two of them. She cleaned up some of his wounds from the horrendous fight with his mother, and told him to go to bed. He needed his rest and she didn’t want him to hurt himself more than he already was. 

The next morning, Yuto woke up, his body sore from his injuries, but he didn’t feel as bad. Whatever Akari had put on his cuts did make them feel better, and he prayed they wouldn’t get infected. He could still see his mother’s face as she beat him half to death, choking him out. He knew that image would be scarred and engraved into his head for months, maybe even years to come. He had never seen such evil in someone’s eyes before and it burned him to his core. He hated his mother, and he knew that she felt the same about him, and maybe even her sister now. He still had no idea what he was going to do. They couldn’t go back there, but there was nowhere else for them to stay. He talked to Wooseok, who reassured him they could stay there as long as they needed. Yuto felt terrible because their home was small, but Wooseok and Sojin didn’t mind much for them to stay until they could get on their feet again. They were good people and they knew they didn’t have anyone else. Yuto and Akari couldn’t stop thanking them because never in their lives had someone been so nice to them. 

Yuto immediately went out that morning, covering his bruises and injuries up the best he could, wearing a scarf to cover his mother’s reminders of what she did. Once only a couple were visible, he went out to hopefully find a job. He couldn’t get his hopes up too high, but he needed it. He needed a job if he was going to try and support himself and his sister. He knew he didn’t have to support her, and she would tell him that over and over since she was older, but he felt responsible for what happened. He wasn’t there to protect her. He had to make up for that. After scouting all across the city, all day long trying to find places that were hiring, he had put in applications of every place he found. Most of them wanted someone with experience, which he didn’t have. He felt hopeless and all he wanted to do was scream. He wanted to scream at the top of his lungs.  
He walked back towards the place he found himself last night, and he didn’t think twice before walking up the hill to the familiar overlook. He hadn’t thought about the fact that Hongseok might be there, but when he got to the top, he was pleased to see he was alone and there wasn’t another presence with him. He didn’t know why, but this felt like the perfect place to just let himself scream, let all of his emotions out. So he did. He stood by the edge of the overlook and just screamed. He kicked up some of the dirt, swung in the air, everything he could do to let some of his emotions out. He didn’t want to lay them on Akari, so he just needed to have some sort of release of his emotions and this was the best he could come up with. He didn’t know what to do. He felt lost, he felt like he had to somehow start his life all over and he had to be the one to take charge, knowing Akari would never do it on her own. He had done this for what seemed like hours, just screaming, yelling, swinging in the air, tugging on his hair, anything that could help him get whatever emotions he was feeling out. He didn’t realize how it started to get dark much faster than he anticipated. Akari would get worried. He might not find his way out, he might pass out from exhaustion, and worst of all, Hongseok might have shown up. 

Hongseok soon returned from his walk. He went to his campsite, tired and exhausted, just wanting to lay down in his tent and enjoy the weather. Something felt off when he got back though. He hoped no one had gotten into his things or stolen anything. He checked and saw everything was still there. What was it that was making him feel so off? He wasn’t sure, but all he knew was that he was exhausted. He was about to start building a fire, when he heard some muffled screaming. At first he thought that maybe he was hearing some things, but as he started to listen closer, it was getting a bit louder and he was worried. He slipped his knife into his pocket and walked towards where the sound was coming from. He knew it had to be at the overlook since it was so close and sounded like it was right there. When he got there, he paused and looked at the scene in front of him. There was Yuto, right on schedule. He looked distressed, though. He looked to be in a deep amount of trouble, he looked like he might jump off the side of the overlook and that concerned Hongseok. 

“Yuto? Hey, are you okay?” Hongseok asked softly, not wanting to scare the younger boy, but failing. Yuto jumped and sucked in a breath. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I just didn’t know how else to approach.” Hongseok said apologetically, Yuto nodding in understanding. There was a brief silence, Yuto pondering on if he should tell Hongseok what was going on. 

“Is everything alright? You look a bit upset.” Hongseok says softly, sitting down on the rock, offering the spot next to him to Yuto. “I know you don’t know me, and probably don’t trust me, but I am a great listener and maybe talking to someone who isn’t associated with the situation might help?” Hongseok suggests, looking up at the younger boy and Yuto sighs. He didn’t know what to do. Maybe he had a point. Maybe talking to him would help instead of holding it all in. Besides, he didn’t have to tell him the whole of it. He could just tell him a shortened, less personal version. After contemplating with himself, Yuto finally sat down and slid his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. He was silent for a second before he began. 

“Honestly, my life has been pretty hectic as of recently. My older sister and I were living with my mom, but we had to leave. She is staying with my best friend, and I am too. I need to find a job so we can go somewhere on our own, but no one seems to want to hire me since I am not experienced in anything. It sucks because I just want to give my sister a better life. She is the greatest person I know and I feel like I am letting her down.” Yuto shrugs, feeling himself getting worked up again. He would be damned if he cried in front of this stranger though, so he kept himself together. “It is just stressful, really. It would be different if I had more options, but I don’t.” It was silent for a while, Hongseok processing what he said and waiting until he knew he wasn’t going to add more to offer a response. 

“I understand that partially. I don’t have a sister to provide for, but I understand having to go out on your own on a whim and having to find work. I am sure your sister is proud of you, though. She is proud of you for going out and looking?” It was more of a question, but Hongseok meant it more as a statement, and Yuto understood. Yuto nodded and he looked out to the small town underneath the overlook. 

“It just sucks. I knew that I was going to have to leave soon, but I wanted to plan it out. I didn’t want things to just happen like this. I am not someone who is super pointed about plans and schedules, but it would have been nice to have some warning, you know?” Hongseok nodded and sighed softly. 

“You seem like a smart guy, a sensible guy, you’ll figure it out. And hey,” Hongseok paused for a moment, not sure if this was the best idea for him to say and do right off the bat, but he felt as though it would be appreciated at least. “If you can’t find a job soon, I could talk to my manager and get you working at the pizza place I work sometimes. The pay isn’t great starting out, but it is something on the back burner, you know?” Yuto looked up at Hongseok, not really knowing what to say to him right now. He wanted to say something, but he couldn’t. His mouth wouldn’t open, his brain wouldn’t work, he was just staring for a moment. A small smile spread on his lips and he nodded slowly. “Thanks Hongseok, I will remember that.” Yuto says quietly. He didn’t like this attention on him, so he quickly changed the topic to turn the tables on Hongseok.

“What about you?” Hongseok gave him a confused look, tilting his head slightly. Yuto laughed slightly and sighed, turning his gaze more to the utterly confused, yet still smiling, Hongseok. “What are you doing out here? Why did you come to camp out here? I know you said you did it just to get away and be in nature, but I can’t help but feel you have some other reason.” Yuto didn’t want to overstep and lose the somewhat of a trust that he had in Hongseok thus far, and wanted it to be reciprocated. Hongseok appreciated Yuto’s straightforward tone, but the question did have him shaking a little bit. 

“Well, long story short, I was getting some unsolicited attention for something I didn’t want, and my family life isn’t so great either. I needed to get away from them and just be alone, and I couldn’t exactly do that unless I came out to the woods, so here I am.” Hongseok shrugged, not knowing what else to add. He knew there was plenty more, to both of their stories, but he wouldn’t push. He wouldn’t push too much or give too much right now, because he wanted them to be comfortable with each other.  
Yuto nodded, not exactly understanding what he meant by that but he would ask about it later. 

It got silent again, the two men sitting side by side in silence, watching the sunset around them. There was an unspoken feeling between the two of them, but neither of them could explain it. It was a comfortable silence. It was a gentle breeze that hit the two of them differently. It was a feeling of watching the sunset and the stars come out with a familiar stranger. It was a nice feeling, a change from their lives before, and they both needed it. Neither of them felt pressure to speak, pressured to hide, neither of them felt like they had to do anything but sit there and enjoy each other’s company. Stargazing with a stranger, sharing problems with a stranger, maybe it wasn’t all bad. Maybe there was a benefit to being in the wrong place at the right time after all.


	5. personal

Hongseok and Yuto started to spend a lot more time with one another. They hadn’t completely opened up to each other, but they knew that it was bound to happen soon. It had only been about a month, and Hongseok was no longer staying out in the woods, but that was their meeting spot now. Almost every other night, the two men would meet each other there, talk about their days, and just enjoy each other’s company. They had grown rather fond of one another and they knew they were bound to be great friends. It was nice having someone to talk to. Both of them felt trapped inside their own little worlds and it was different and a fond change that they now had someone to talk to that wasn’t directly correlated to their issues personally. They felt comfortable with one another and knew that they could be honest with one another. 

This night was a particularly hard night for Yuto. He had to face his mother again after about three weeks of being away. He had gotten another job, with the help of Hongseok. His sister permanently moved in with Wooseok because well, they had started dating, so she was going to stay there regardless of what Yuto did. He had to see his mother because he had to go back to his previous home to get something. He had somewhat of a panic attack due to the intense amount of abuse that he faced the last time he was there. He faced his mother and she acted the same way, if not worse. This time though, Yuto wouldn’t take a beating. No, he stood up for himself to the best of his ability, and his mom backed off, but that shook him to his core. He hated it and he left as soon as he could. He took what he grabbed to Wooseok’s house, stored it away, and immediately made his way to his favorite spot in the whole world to meet one of his new favorite people there per their nightly routine. When he got there though, Hongseok was nowhere to be found. Yuto frowned, but didn’t leave, figuring that Hongseok would be there soon. He hadn’t texted him and told him he wasn’t going to be there, and he didn’t think he would blow him off for anything, so he sat a little longer and hoped his friend would show up. He sat atop the rock and leaned back, staring up at the skyline that was dimming with the night on it’s way to take over the sky. Yuto felt more at peace here, but he would feel better if his friend showed up. He waited, and waited some more. He was there for almost an hour, humming to himself, writing songs in his head, whatever to pass the time until Hongseok would show up. He was starting to get worried, and he thought that maybe he should go home. Right as he was sitting up though, Hongseok showed up, and he didn’t exactly look too thrilled. 

Yuto immediately sat up straighter and gave him a concerned look, but Hongseok didn’t say anything and just sat beside him and sighed softly, biting his lip gently while looking at the soft blades of grass underneath his feet. Yuto hesitated to say anything to him, not sure if he should just yet, maybe he should wait for him to speak up. But when he didn’t, Yuto took the opportunity to strike up a conversation. 

“Hey, what’s up? You don’t look too thrilled to see me.” Yuto tries to joke, to which Hongseok smiles a little bit and looks up at him.  
“I am actually much happier to see you than you think, I just had a rough encounter with my family.” Hongseok sighs, running a hand down his face before sitting up straighter and slightly turning to Yuto, who only gives him a questioning look.  
“What happened?”  
“It’s a long story…” Hongseok trails off and Yuto shrugs, smiling at him softly.  
“I’ve got time, I’ve got all night, spill it.” He pulls his legs up, crossing them atop the rock they were sitting on and he looks over at him, giving Hongseok his full attention. After a bit of contemplation, Hongseok sighs. 

“I guess I should start from the beginning.. Of where a lot of things started to go south.” He paused, and Yuto just nodded, ready to hear whatever his friend had to say. “Growing up, I was a really shy kid. I wasn’t outgoing and boisterous like my brother, and that got me a lot of shit. Everyone loved my brother. He was always athletic. He was always funny and it was easy for him to make friends. Me though? I was fat, I was shy, and I wasn’t exactly keen on making friends and when I tried, I failed miserably. I got bullied a lot for my weight and for how shy I was all throughout elementary and middle school. So in high school, I started to work out a lot more, I cared so much about how I looked, I changed my whole lifestyle just so I wouldn’t get bullied and so people would like me.” He paused and ran a hand through his tousled hair. “And when I started to do that, it made my brother and I a lot closer. We work out together and all of those kinds of things, but I started to get a lot of attention from girls that I wasn’t necessarily fond of. Sure, I liked it for a while, but people started coming on to me, people started trying to get with me, and it was annoying. I let my brother talk me into making social media pages and all I get are thirsty girls in my DMS and in the comments talking about how they want to do this and how they want to be with me and blah blah blah and I know this is a stupid thing to complain about, but… I guess I just expected something different from it. I don’t like the attention, and so I finally deleted everything and left it alone. Well, my brother started to question me tonight while we were having dinner with our family. He was asking me why I did it, and why I never responded to any of the girls, and why I never did this or that with them, and I guess something in me just caught fire and I snapped at him, telling him that I didn’t like girls. I outed myself to my whole family tonight and I knew they were going to react badly, but… I didn’t think they were going to be… so cruel about it. My mom didn’t say anything, but she started to cry like I had just told her I was going to die. My brother looked at me like he didn’t even know who I was. And my dad well.. He was a little less than thrilled to find out one of his sons was gay. He had some harsh words to say and he wasn’t accepting of anything at all. He told me he would rather me be on intense and insane drugs than like men so.. That was pretty fucking terrible to hear that from him and have my family all look at me with disgust like I did something wrong. It was so terrible and it made me feel awful. My family has never really accepted me on any kind of level, and I wasn’t going to tell them at all honestly, but I was so tired of my brother trying to force girls on me and force me to flirt with them that I just snapped.” Hongseok could feel the tears threatening to spill from his eyes, but he kept it together and held them in as long as he possibly could. He didn’t know what else to say or what else to do. He knew Yuto wouldn’t judge him or make fun of him for showing his emotions in a time like this, but he didn’t want to cry nonetheless. 

Yuto listened to him intently, frowning when he heard what was happening with Hongseok. He was surprised to hear that his friend was gay, but he wouldn’t say anything because he would save that for another time. He was silent for a moment, hearing Hongseok sniffle slightly to try and keep his composure. Yuto had grown fond of Hongseok and knew he wouldn’t mind, so he instinctively wrapped his arms around him and just hugged him. Hongseok didn’t pull away, just leaning a little more into it. He could feel the tears threatening to leak from his eyes, and at this point, he let it happen. He didn’t like that he was crying, but he couldn’t hold it in any longer. It felt like he had been waiting for this moment his whole life, waiting for someone to just hug him and make him feel like everything is okay. “I can’t say I understand how you feel, because no one in my family knows I’m gay either, not even my sister. I know she wouldn’t react that way, so I wouldn’t understand either way,” Yuto starts off softly, “But they are stupid for making you feel this way. There is nothing wrong with you being gay, and there isn’t anything wrong with you telling them. I know that the way they reacted was wrong and it hurt you. That isn’t fair. They don’t get to decide how you live your life and who you should love. As your family, they are supposed to love and support you. Maybe they will come around, maybe they won’t, but I will always be right here by your side, okay?” He gives Hongseok a soft little smile and Hongseok moves from his grip, sitting up a little slower, wiping his eyes. 

“You’re right, maybe they will wrap their head around the idea, but I doubt it. They aren’t exactly the most supportive of gay people. They are your typical homophobes, sadly.” Hongseok sighs and looks at Yuto. “Wait, did you say you were gay too?” He asks curiously and Yuto smiled slightly, nodding. “Yeah, I am. I know 100% for a fact I am, not that you aren’t, I just am saying.” He stumbles over his words slightly and Hongseok laughs a bit. Yuto had finally come to terms with himself. Yuto was happy to see Hongseok smiling and he smiled a little too. But he wasn’t expecting Hongseok’s next question. “Why are you so certain? I mean did something happen?” Hongseok didn’t want to overstep any boundaries with Yuto and drive him away, but he was curious to why he had to try and verify it to him. Yuto seemed to tense up slightly and he just shook his head.  
“Well.. I dated this girl and she wasn’t exactly kind to me. She had a way of making me feel pretty bad about myself. The only reason I dated her was to shut my mom up about me never having a girlfriend when I was in high school, so I just started dating her. She knew that was the only reason we were together and that I wasn’t going to break up with her because I needed to try and prove something to my mom. She was controlling, she was aggressive, she wasn’t exactly the nicest person alive. She would always try and force me to have sex with her to try and turn me straight. That combined with how my mom treated me, I just don’t want to be with a woman ever. And I know that is a bit of a silly reason to some people, but having someone treat you like that your whole life and try to force you into a lifestyle you didn’t like to begin with really pushes you further and further from it. That is why I know I am 100% gay. Plus, I have done things before with guys, I am not embarrassed to admit it. So yeah, that’s about it.” Yuto shrugged it off like it was no big deal, even though his anxiety and heartbeat was through the roof. Hongseok wasn’t leaning against his chest anymore, but he was almost certain that he would be able to hear Yuto’s heartbeat with how loudly it was banging against his chest. He didn’t like remembering how they treated him, and he wished he could just get away from it, but he knew it would be with him no matter what. He tried not to think too hard about it and focused his attention on Hongseok instead. 

Hongseok looked over at him and he completely turned so he could face him. He didn’t say anything for a moment and Yuto didn’t either. There was a silent exchange of understanding between the two of them and they were quiet for what felt like eternity, but it was really not even five minutes.  
“You know something?” Hongseok asks softly. Yuto doesn’t respond verbally, but gives him a raised eyebrow to tell him to keep going. “You’re the first real friend that I think I have ever had in my entire life. You are the first person who hasn’t gotten tired of me, the first person who hasn’t abandoned me or only liked me for my looks. You really are a true friend to me and I wanna thank you for that. I feel like I have known you a lifetime and I am very comfortable talking to you. I know that it is kind of cheesy and weird to say after the conversation we just had, but I mean it. Thank you for being so nice to me and sticking by my side thus far.” Yuto can’t help but smile at his friend’s little confession. He nods softly and smiles over at him, nudging him slightly with his hand and nods. “I feel the same way. I haven’t had any friends hardly except Wooseok, but he wasn’t exactly the best person to talk to. I was glad when I met you, and ever since then, even though it’s only been a little while, not even a month, but I do think that I have never been closer to someone in my life and that is nice. It is a nice change of speed to have someone that I can talk to whenever about whatever and not feel judged or feel like I am not being listened to. I genuinely feel like I could tell you everything in my life and it wouldn’t change how you look at me and that is something you can’t find in a lot of people. I am really glad we met.” Yuto smiled and Hongseok did the same. 

After another soft moment of silence, Yuto asked the question that had been floating around in his mind for what felt like hours now.  
“Have you ever been with a guy?” He asked, quickly restating what he actually meant by his words, “like dated a guy? Not necessarily did anything else?” Yuto felt embarrassed, but he held it together. Hongseok blushed slightly and luckily it was dark, or Yuto would have seen how quickly his cheeks had turned red. He shook his head slowly. “I haven’t been with a man that way, I didn’t necessarily date a guy, but we had somewhat of a thing for a little while a couple months ago, but that was it. It was never anything serious, but after that I knew for sure I was gay. I didn’t have a question in my mind about it.” Hongseok was going to ask Yuto the same thing, but he already knew the answer. He wanted to ask him about it, but felt that would be way too personal, so he left it alone and again, they were surrounded by silence. 

The two men leaned back on the rock and stared up at the sky. They had told each other a lot that night. They spent the next few hours talking about whatever came to their minds. They were telling each other things they had never told anyone, secrets, and lost memories that they couldn’t share with anyone else. Both men felt at ease. Both men felt they knew each other on much more of a personal level at that point in time. Underneath the stars that night, the two men realized that something was pushing them together, that the universe had a plan for them. Neither of them knew if it was just this incredible bond in their friendship, or if it was something more and something deeper. No matter what it was, both men were feeling it and knew that the stars were aligning for the two of them; to give them what they both longed for and didn’t know they needed or wanted.


	6. maybe a little

“You know,” Hongseok starts, looking over at Yuto one night, “We always hang out here. I know this is our spot. I know this is our special place where we stare at the stars and talk about our shitty lives,” he jokes, “but maybe we could hang out somewhere else? Maybe we could go out and explore other places you know, actually go do something?” He looks over at Yuto who was thinking about it, smiling slightly. 

“Maybe you’re right. We have been friends for months now and we haven’t even actually done anything except hike around here. Maybe we should go exploring together now. It’s still daylight, and even when it gets dark, and when you get scared, I can hold your hand.” Yuto jokes, giving Hongseok a nudge. Hongseok smiled and tried to hide the glint in his eyes at the idea. He stood up and pulled Yuto up with him. “Where should we go, then?” He asks, looking over at the taller boy who he just struggled to pull up himself. Yuto pondered for a while. He had been to a lot of places in their little town, the city being boring, so he didn’t much want to go anywhere there. His eyes lightened up after a moment and he nodded more to himself than Hongseok. “Come on.” Was all he said before he was pulling Hongseok along with him down the hill from their spot and to his old beaten down truck. “Hopefully you will like it. I like going there, so maybe you will too.” He gave Hongseok one of his famous wide smiles, to which Hongseok gave one right back. He trusted Yuto to take him wherever he wanted. He was happy to see the younger boy so happy. They had both been through a lot and it was nice to have someone to smile and joke around with. “Now, just for the record, we might get a little wet.” Yuto laughed and Hongseok gave him a questioning look. “A water park?” Hongseok questioned and Yuto just shook his head. “No, not a water park. We’re going somewhere special.” Hongseok wasn’t sure what that meant, but he let it slide for a moment, just putting his trust in his friend. 

The drive wasn’t too long, about thirty minutes. They were on the whole other side of town and Hongseok was slightly surprised. He had never really come over to this side of town alot. He didn’t see any reason to. There was nothing to do. It was just a bunch of run down old houses from God knows when and the only people that lived over here were older farmers who lived on their own with no one else around. Hongseok didn’t want to judge because any place that Yuto liked and thought was special, probably was special. Yuto was a very special boy, so Hongseok knew that no matter where they went, if they went together, it would be special. Hongseok didn’t know what it was about him that made him feel this way but he didn’t mind it. He made him comfortable, like he could be himself, and he made him happy in the best friendship kind of way. Yuto was his best friend to say the least, and he didn’t know if Yuto felt the same way or not, but he hoped so. They had spent so much time together, learned so much about one another, that Hongseok couldn’t see his life without Yuto. It was like without him now, his life would be boring and he wouldn’t be the same. He would have to go back to being a shell of himself, just like with his family. He didn’t like the thought of that, so he hoped he never had to leave Yuto’s side. 

Yuto did feel the same way about Hongseok. He saw something in him that he had never seen in someone before. He liked the feeling he got from Hongseok. He never felt threatened, he never felt like he had to hide who he was. He never felt ashamed of himself around him, especially about his sexuality. There was so much about Hongseok that he admired and he was glad that they were friends; best friends. He wouldn’t know what to do if he didn’t have Hongseok by his side and that was the truth. In a way, they needed one another to balance everything in their lives out. They needed this friendship, this happiness, this bond to get them through things. Yuto had that with his sister somewhat but it was different; they had to be. They were all they had. Hongseok had his brother, but he didn’t feel especially close to him. Either way, both of them needed one another and they were glad to have each other. Yuto knew that Hongseok was going to be in his life for a long time and he was okay with that. They were both okay with that. 

Yuto pulled into a little parking area, but there was hardly anyone around. It didn’t surprise either of them because usually, people weren’t out on this side of town during the day, if at all. Yuto turned off his truck and hopped out, grabbing Hongseok’s arm and dragging him along. “So I guess it isn’t too much different from our spot, but it has one difference.” He tells him before smiling. “Close your eyes buddy, I want it to be a surprise.” Hongseok rolled his eyes but closed them anyways, letting Yuto guide him up a hill for what seemed like forever, but he finally stopped. Hongseok furrowed his eyebrows. “Did it get hot?” Yuto chuckles and moves his hands from his eyes. Before them was a hot spring. There weren’t many in their state, let alone in their city. “It’s a hot spring. It’s really special. It is supposed to be full of mineral water and since it is natural, it is really good for you and it has somewhat of a healing quality. I thought we could check it out?” Hongseok gives him a certain look. “We are getting in there?” He asks with a questioning look on his face. Yuto chuckles and nudges him. “Yeah, I thought it could be fun. Unless you're chicken.” He makes a gesture of the wings, starting to squawk at Hongseok. He nudges him back and without another word, Yuto begins to take his shirt off. The older boy watched as he slid the shirt off his back, his toned muscles really showing as he removed the shirt. His skin was almost soft looking, skin tanned like golden honey, and his body was so toned. Hongseok found himself staring at him a little too long and he looked away sheepishly before Yuto could notice. But Yuto did notice and a small smirk crawled on his lips. Yuto wasn’t extremely confident in his body, but he knew that his work on their family farm and his working out really did his body some good. After he slid his shirt off, his shorts were the next to go. “Come on pretty boy, strip down and join me in this hot spring.” Hongseok rolled his eyes at him. He didn’t like being called pretty boy, even as a joke, but from Yuto it felt okay and felt natural. “Alright alright.” Hongseok slid his shirt off and tossed it down, kicking his shoes and then his jeans off, leaving him in his boxers. He dipped his foot in first and was shocked at how warm it was as Yuto just got right in, letting himself sink into the warm water.

“Doesn’t this feel like a bath to you?” Hongseok asked curiously, which caused Yuto to laugh and shake his head.  
“Sort of, but a very refreshing, mind enhancing bath.” He shrugged. Hongseok didn’t really know what he meant, but he let it slide either way. He finally got into the hot spring, eyes widening at how quickly you could feel how different the water was. “Wow..” He said more to himself than to Yuto. He sank his body into the water, sighing softly at the feeling of the water taking over his body. There was a huge difference and he really did understand why Yuto would come here. It was magical, it made you feel like a whole different person. Yuto smiled over at Hongseok as he seemed to be enjoying himself. Yuto liked seeing him smile, liked seeing him laugh and just look happy. He wanted to see that smile of his forever. 

The two men sat quietly and contently for a while, just enjoying one another’s company. They didn’t need words, and that was one quality both boys loved about each other. They were never in awkward silence, and they never felt like they couldn’t be themselves around one another. They never felt judged and they always felt free to do and say whatever was on their minds. After a moment, Yuto decided to tease Hongseok just a little. He sat up a bit where the water was just resting at his chest and he turned to him. “I saw you staring at me, by the way. Do you like my body, Hongseok?” Yuto asked with a bit of a teasing undertone. Hongseok wasn’t expecting that, and he didn’t expect that Yuto had caught him either. He gulped slightly and he cleared his throat, shrugging. “Nothing wrong with a guy checking out his best friend, right?” He tried to play it off but it came off a bit strained and Yuto could tell. He just smirked and shrugged. “Nice to know you were checking me out, makes up for the times I’ve checked you out then, hmm?” Hongseok wasn’t sure what to think. Did Yuto check him out a lot? Did he actually or was he just playing around? Hongseok couldn’t tell but he had to keep his composure so Yuto didn’t suspect anything. Hongseok just rolled his eyes and laughed it off. “I guess we’re even then.” Yuto nodded and it got quiet again. 

Hongseok’s heart was beating out of his chest at this point. He didn’t know what to think. Was Yuto flirting with him? Was he trying to get him to admit something? Was he pushing for Hongseok to admit he had a crush on him? Wait, what? Hongseok’s thoughts were all over the place. He didn’t like Yuto like that did he? No, there was no way. They were best friends and they did everything together. He loved him like a best friend and that was it. Sure, he made him happy. He made him feel more at home and more comfortable than anyone. Sure, he comforted him and held him when he felt like falling apart. Sure, he would hug him and give him little friendly kisses on the side of his head when he needed them, but he didn’t like him more than a friend. Hongseok was so in his thoughts to try and keep himself from overthinking, that he didn’t even notice Yuto sitting right in front of him. 

“What?” Hongseok asked, finally snapping back into it.  
“Nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You didn’t answer me and you sort of looked like you were out of it.” Yuto shrugged, glancing into his eyes. 

Hongseok’s poor heart was beating at a ridiculous rate now, not sure he’d be able to breathe in a second. He couldn’t wrap his head around this situation. Maybe he didn’t actually like Yuto. Maybe he liked the thought of him being around, he liked the thought of having someone there for him always. But something in his heart felt differently. His brain was saying one thing but his heart was saying something totally different. He wanted to believe that this was just his projection of loneliness telling him he had feelings for Yuto, but he couldn’t deny it anymore. He knew he liked him. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that he felt something for Yuto. He wouldn’t call it love, simply because he didn’t think he could love someone that fast, but he knew that the last couple of months with Yuto had been the best of his life and he felt deeply attached to him. He found himself staring at Yuto too long and Yuto caught him, giving him a soft smile. 

“Stuck in your head again, huh?” Yuto asks softly to Hongseok, who immediately blushes after realizing he had been stuck in his thoughts and staring at Yuto all over again. Hongseok shrugged and nodded, leaning back against one of the natural barriers.  
“Sort of, I have some stuff on my mind but nothing serious.” Yuto raises an eyebrow and gives him a knowing look.  
“C’mon Seok, you know you can’t fool me after all these months. What’s up? You can talk to me.” Yuto says softly, sitting back beside him and looking at him genuinely to listen.  
Hongseok sighs and shakes his head. “It’s nothing, I promise. I am just having some weird feelings about life.” That wasn’t a lie, really. Hongseok was having weird feelings about life, about what he wanted in his life. Yuto gave him a bit of a look and tilted his head back and forth.  
“Well, I will take your word for it. But if you ever want to talk about these weird life feelings, you know that I will always listen, judgment free.” Yuto rubbed his back softly before moving around in the water, sighing softly at the warm water. 

Hongseok was in way too deep. He knew that there was no denying it anymore. He really liked Yuto and he thought that this was going to tear him apart. Yes, Yuto was gay. Yes, Yuto had been sweet to him and so warm, but that was just his nature. What if Yuto would be driven away by Hongseok? What if he didn’t want to open up to him about it and thought Hongseok was stupid for even thinking about him in that way? You weren’t supposed to fall in love with your best friend, were you? But your significant other could be your best friend. Hongseok was so confused and he didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t going to say anything, but he didn’t have to fight it anymore; he couldn’t. He liked Yuto and he had to figure out what to do about it. 

After about another hour, Yuto’s stomach growled and he chuckled, pushing himself up out of the hot spring, holding his hand out for Hongseok to grab. The younger boy pulled him out in one swift motion and Hongseok just stood there like an idiot, staring at his shirtless friend dripping wet in front of him. Yuto just smirked slightly and nudged him. “Stop staring, I know I am hot, both literally and figuratively, but I am also hungry. Come on, I am in the mood for some pizza.” Hongseok laughed at his best friend’s comment, and for a moment, he had forgotten all about those raging thoughts inside his head. Instead, all he could think about was how lucky he was to have such a sweet, funny, dumb at times, but always caring best friend by his side. They dried off, slid their clothes back on, and made their way to the truck to find a pizza place. Hongseok was content with this. Even if he never admitted his feelings, even if all they ever had was this friendship, he wouldn’t trade it for the world. He was just lucky to be in Yuto’s presence and if this was all he would ever get, then he wouldn’t complain about it. But maybe the universe could pull through for him, just this once.


	7. realization

Laying underneath the stars with your best friend in silence was just another day to Yuto and Hongseok. That was their thing. They liked to say that their friendship was written in the stars and that the universe brought them together that night for a reason. Sure it might have sounded cringy and sappy to other people, but they didn’t care. That was what they did, that was what they believed in their friendship and that is what they went along with. They didn’t have to listen to anyone else. They didn’t have to worry about anyone else’s opinions. They were best friends, this was their spot, and that was what they wanted to believe. 

As the two laid there, it had been silent for about thirty minutes. Both of them had rough days. Yuto heard that his sister was going to move away with Wooseok. They were running off together and she didn’t even talk to Yuto first. She didn’t have to, of course, she was an adult and could take charge of her own life, but it upset him. They told each other almost everything; never keeping secrets, and here she was trying to keep her secret of her moving away low key so he wouldn’t find out yet. But Wooseok was a bit of a blabber mouth. He was upset to say the least. She was his only family. Everyone else had pushed him away, his father passed away, his mother didn’t want anything to do with him, and the rest of his family was so distanced from him, he probably couldn’t even name another family member of his besides Akari. It broke his heart to think she was going so far away, but what could he do? He had to deal with it and put on a happy face for her. He didn’t want to be vulnerable in front of Hongseok right now. He wasn’t even sure he wanted to tell Hongseok yet, scared that something would happen. But he started to think about it. If Akari was moving away, at least he would have Hongseok. It sucked, it would be terrible without his sister around because they had always had each other to lean on. Now, they both had someone new to lean on and they were content with those people. Yuto would still have Hongseok, but he still would miss his sister. It would be weird without her. 

Hongseok wasn’t having much luck in the sibling department, either. His brother was a bit older than him, three years older and he was just waiting for an opportunity to jump start his life. He got an offer to be a model for some fitness advocates magazine and work through their company and he would be an idiot not to take it. That is what he told his brother, anyways. Jun was a bit skeptical at first, but he knew that if he didn’t jump at this first opportunity, he might lose it. He did feel bad though. Hongseok had accidentally come out to his family and they were still treating him like shit for. Their whole family knew and everyone was treating him different, except Jun. He was surprised to see his brother was gay, but it all made sense. He wanted him to know that he didn’t love him any less just because he liked men instead of women. He felt terrible, and he had told Hongseok over and over that he could just come with him. Hongseok thought about it, but he didn’t want to do that. He wasn’t cut out for that lifestyle, not to mention that he would have to leave Yuto and he would be stupid to do that. He loved Jun, but he loved his best friend just the same. 

Both men were quiet, and that was okay. Neither of them said anything for a while, and they laid in comfortable silence, staring up at the stars. It was a beautiful night, really. It was a little chilly, but not enough that you couldn’t stay outside. The sky was clear of all clouds and anything that would block the stars. They seemed to shine a little brighter on the two of them that night. This night felt different though, and neither of them knew why. It was just a calm night, even though both of their heads were running wild with thoughts. They wanted to open up to one another, but they didn’t want to be too vulnerable to each other at the same time. They knew they could be, but both of them did want to keep a little of their “manly” personas up as long as they could. It was quiet for just a little while longer, until Hongseok finally spoke up. 

“Junnie is leaving in two days for New York.” He finally says softly, not turning his eyes away from the night sky in front of him. “He got a modeling deal and a partnership offer with some fitness company in New York and they are paying for everything for him there.” He doesn’t know what else to say, just sighing softly. “It sucks and it’s kind of tearing me apart. I know that I have you and that is great because you’re my best friend and all, but it just feels bad because my family isn’t the best to me and without having Jun to back me up, it is going to be worse living there.” Hongseok sighed and could feel himself tearing up at the thought of it. His brother was going to be so far away, and he knew he could go with him, but he wouldn’t want to leave Yuto behind. Not now, and not ever. He wanted to be in his life until he couldn’t anymore. 

Yuto wasn’t sure what to say, so he sat up slowly and looked down at Hongseok. He could see the tears starting to form in his eyes a little bit and it almost broke his heart. He was going through the same thing and could understand what he was going through. He didn’t know what he could do to comfort his friend, but he thought telling him that he was going through the same thing might give him some kind of comfort. Hongseok sat up after a moment and sighed shakily, looking over at Yuto. Yuto didn’t hesitate and scooted closer to him, pulling him into his arms to hold him. He didn’t know if this is what Hongseok wanted or needed, but he wanted to comfort him. As soon as he did, Hongseok couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. He wasn’t full on sobbing, but he was crying at the thought of not having his brother around. It would be hard, but he would have to get through it somehow. Yuto rubbed his back for a moment before he started to speak. 

“I know how you are feeling in a way. I am going through the same situation. As you already know, Akari and Wooseok started dating shortly after you and I met and I was happy for them, I still am. I am glad they have one another because she deserves someone to love her and treat her right. I can tell they really love one another and it is so nice to see. But I guess they decided they wanted to move away to Singapore. I’m not sure why, honestly. I don’t actually know, because Akari hasn’t told me. The only reason that I know is because I overheard Wooseok telling someone else. It sucks that she is being so secretive and I wish she would just tell me. Maybe she isn’t telling me because she knows that it is going to hurt both of us. Growing up, especially after our dad died, we were all we had. Our mom was a piece of garbage and we only had each other to lean on. I know she is older, she’s an adult, and she’s allowed to make her own choices, I just want her to be honest and tell me. It is going to hurt like hell when they leave, but I can’t hold her back. I support her 100%, it is just going to be so different without her here.” Yuto finishes, sighing softly, holding himself together for Hongseok. 

“I guess we are both kind of in the same boat, huh?” Hongseok asked with a small sniffle as he wiped the tears from his eyes before looking up at Yuto. The younger boy hated to see him cry and he wiped one of the stray tears from his eyes and sighed, giving him a small nod.   
“I guess so.” He whispered before shifting so he could look at him better. “But at least we have each other. I don’t want to ever lose you, you know that right?” Yuto said seriously, looking Hongseok right in his eyes. Hongseok could feel his whole body heat up at that moment, knowing he was probably blushing but he didn’t care honestly. He didn’t care if Yuto saw him this way. He was tired of hiding his feelings. He knew he didn’t have to with Yuto, and he wouldn’t. Did that mean he had to admit he liked him? No, of course not. He probably wouldn’t for a while, but it just felt okay with him. He didn’t have to hide his feelings, he didn’t feel judged or uncomfortable ever. 

Yuto looked down at him with this new glint in his eyes, and he smiled just barely as he looked down at him. Hongseok was only slightly smaller than him, but from this angle he just looked so small, so vulnerable, like he could break any moment. He knew that he had always had to hide his feelings. His family wasn’t a very emotional family who even cared about their feelings either way. Yuto didn’t want Hongseok to feel like he had to hide them, and when Hongseok was vulnerable like this, showing that he did have emotions and that he trusted Yuto, it made his heart warm. It really showed that he cared about him, and Yuto cared about him so much. He wasn’t sure what overcame him but suddenly he understood himself. He finally understood what was screaming at him in his mind this whole time. Ever since he met Hongseok, there was a bit of doubt about his sexuality. He never admitted it to anyone. He wouldn’t even admit it to himself. He felt ashamed. He thought his father would be ashamed of him, and that was something he didn’t like to think about. His father was gone but he could still feel him in his heart sometimes and he just thought that maybe his father would be disappointed or ashamed that his son was gay. His dad was a good person though, so maybe not. But now, that didn’t even cross his mind. At this moment, he wasn’t afraid of it. He wasn’t afraid to let the feelings take over. He was so used to keeping everything inside and doing his best to hide his sexuality, but for once, he didn’t have to. He felt fine with it and knew that Hongseok was the same way. Everything felt fine. He found himself staring at Hongseok for a little too long, which Hongseok took the moment to tease him of course. 

“What are you staring at there, buddy?” He asked tearfully, chuckling as he wiped the remaining tears from his eyes as he tried to forget about his brother leaving him and just enjoying this moment with Yuto. He always had a way of making him feel better, they both did. No matter what their lives threw at the two of them, they were there for one another and could always make each other feel better. That was something that they both found great comfort in. It was nice to have someone that you could talk to and never had to worry about them hurting you or saying something to have the same effect. They were 100% comfortable and felt like they didn’t need anyone else in the world. It didn’t matter what happened, as long as they had each other. Yuto chuckled at his question, realizing he was mocking him from a couple days ago and rolled his eyes just as Hongseok did.   
“What is a guy not allowed to stare at his best friend?” He asked mockingly, gently nudging him. Now Hongseok rolled his eyes again and sighed, finally giving Yuto a smile. Yuto always loved that smile and would do anything to make him smile if he had the power to. Hongseok saw the way that Yuto was looking at him and it made his heart race. 

Yuto didn’t know what to do. They were now just staring at each other, both having a certain look in their eyes. Yuto wasn’t sure what he should do, what he should say, none of that. Maybe he should just do it. Maybe he should just kiss him. Maybe he should just break down, tell him what he is feeling, and call it a night. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to do it. He didn’t think now was the right time. So, all he did was smile at Hongseok beneath him, push some of his hair out of his face, and stuck his tongue out at him to make him laugh, which worked. Hongseok sat up, nudged him, laughed and then turned back to look up at the stars. 

“I’m really glad you didn’t run away that night.” Hongseok says softly, referring to the night they met, which Yuto already knew. He looked over at the older boy and smiled, nodding.   
“I’m glad to. Who knows where I would be if I hadn’t met you.” And he said that honestly. Yuto wasn’t suicidal by any means, and he wouldn’t do that to Akari. But he wouldn’t be doing so hot right now if he hadn’t had come up that hill to that lookout that night. Meeting Hongseok was probably the highlight of his life as cheesy as that sounded. Hongseok smiled at him and gave him a soft night.   
“Yeah, me too.” Hongseok said softly and he didn’t say anything else, sliding his hand into Yuto’s without another word. 

Both boys sat quietly after that. The night was coming to an end soon. They met a lot later tonight, and now the dawn was coming up soon. They usually left before the sun came up, but this time, they didn’t. They sat right by one another, holding hands and watched as the night sky full of stars soon became a beautiful sunrise. Neither of them said anything still, but as the sun started to come up over the horizon, Yuto looked over at Hongseok. He looked absolutely beautiful in this light. He had seen Hongseok in great lighting, but this was probably the most handsome he had ever seen him look. The way the natural sunlight hit him, it was stunning. He wanted to keep a mental picture of it forever and he would. This was such a beautiful moment, but it was even better when Hongseok turned to him. He stared in his eyes and they just stared at one another for what felt like hours, but was really only about a minute. Hongseok quickly leaned in and kissed Yuto’s lips before standing up.   
“Thanks for spending the night with me and watching this beautiful sunrise with me. I hope we can do this more often.” And with that, Hongseok smiled before walking away, down the hill, and back towards his house, leaving Yuto there dumbfounded. 

Hongseok just kissed him. Yuto didn’t know what to believe. Did that actually just happen? He wasn’t sure what to think, honestly. Maybe it was just a friendly peck, but would he do it on his lips? He didn’t know. All he knew was that he couldn’t wipe the stupid grin off his face. He stayed there for a little, watching as the sun completely rose up into the sky and he just smiled as it did. He had come to the realization that he never wanted to spend his nights without Hongseok. He loved spending his time with him, watching sunrises with him, teasing him, crying with him; everything with him. There was no doubt now. He didn’t know how Hongseok felt, but he knew that his heart wouldn’t be content without Hongseok. He wanted to be able to call him his. He knew that whatever happened in his life, he could always count on Hongseok and the happiness and warmth that brought him was indescribable. No matter what happened, whether it went anywhere past a best friendship or not, he was content knowing that he had him by his side and that he could always count on him. He would be fine with him the rest of his life though, more than fine, he would be over the moon. It had to be written in the stars. 

The stars had to cross to make this happen, they just had to.


	8. finally

The next couple of days, four to be exact, Hongseok and Yuto didn’t see one another. They didn’t meet at their spot at night, simply because it had been raining non-stop and not to mention, they wanted to spend as much time with their siblings as possible. Hongseok spent every moment he could with Jun, knowing that he was going to have to leave soon. He didn’t like it, but he knew that it had to happen. Jun deserved to go on and do something that he loved to do because he deserved to be happy. This was going to make him happier. Their parents were happy that Jun was finally leaving, and they tried to force Hongseok out with him. Hongseok was tired of being treated that way and he knew that he could only take so much. It would only get worse once Jun left. Hongseok didn’t have a lot of choices, but he would figure it out soon. All he knew was he was going to miss his brother like crazy. 

Yuto felt the same way about Akari. She finally told him, even though he already knew. She was so excited about it, but she did feel terrible about leaving Yuto. He reassured her about a hundred times that it was okay and that he would be okay. She didn’t want to leave him alone, but he promised her he wasn’t alone and that he would be okay on his own. Yuto knew she was happy with Wooseok. She was happy with him, happier than Yuto had ever seen her and he knew that she loved him. He was happy for his sister and Wooseok. Was he excited that they were moving away? No, but whatever made them happy, he would 100% support. He made sure to spend every moment he could with her because they were already planning to leave next week. Wooseok offered to leave the house to Yuto, but he declined it. Wooseok’s sister was staying there for a little while and Yuto just said he’d stay there until he could get his own place. He didn’t want to be a bother. He was happy for his sister and he just wanted to spend as much time with her as he could before they left in a few days. He was going to be broken without her, but he has Hongseok and that was enough for him, and he always would be. 

It was a bit weird, Akari and Jun both left the same day. The first day that it stopped raining, they were off. It was painful for both of them. Yuto didn’t want to let go of his sister and she felt the same way. They probably hugged for almost twenty minutes, Akari continuously apologizing to Yuto and telling him that she loved him. He reassured her every time it was okay. He told her that he was going to miss her like crazy and keep in touch, but she needed to live her life and be happy. Wooseok and his sister barely even hugged, but that was okay. Yuto finally let go and looked at Akari, smiling at her and sighing. “Just promise me to call me okay?” She nodded and they gave one last hug before she was off. Yuto held himself together until they were through the gate, but then he let it all out. He hated that he wasn’t going to see her for God knows how long and he couldn’t stop crying once he got into his car. He probably looked like a baby. Hongseok thought he would be no better, though. 

Hongseok’s parents didn’t even take the time to take Jun to the airport. They were angry with him for moving so far away. They were mad that Hongseok didn’t go with him. They were having the reverse of empty nest syndrome. They wanted both of them gone, and pretty soon they would have that. Hongseok took his brother instead. Neither of them were criers in front of one another and for a moment, they just stared at one another. Jun finally pulled his brother into a tight hug, holding him there for a while before ruffling his hair like he always did. Hongseok was going to speak but Jun beat him to it. 

“We aren’t going to get into the sappy stuff, neither of us are good at that. But I am going to miss you a lot, really. I won’t lose contact with you I promise. I know mom and dad are pricks and they’re probably going to be pricks to you while I am gone. Just remember that you’re better than that. You’re great, and you being gay isn’t a problem. You should tell that boy, you like him by the way.” Hongseok’s eyes got a little wide and Jun just laughed. “You don’t think I have seen you two up there? I saw you with my truck one day and saw you two up there. I saw one glance the two of you took at one another and there is no doubt in my mind that you two like one another. Don’t be scared to admit your feelings to him, Seok. Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, I think your friendship will be fine.” He nudged him and smiled. “And don’t worry, I will fill you in on everything happening with me, but you better do the same. And hey, if you ever need anything or wanna come up there with me, just say the word and I’ll get you there.” Hongseok smiled at his older brother and nodded before giving him another hug. “Love you, bro. Be safe.” Hongseok told him before he left to go catch his flight. As he watched him walk away, he already felt that empty spot forming in his heart, but he didn’t cry. He didn’t think he was going to cry surprisingly. His mind was more focused on Yuto honestly and what Jun said. He needed to tell Yuto how he felt, just not today. 

The two men spent the rest of their days feeling lonely, but not wanting to bother each other by being sad. But finally, around midnight, both men were awake and Hongseok and Yuto both felt something eating at them. They felt the aching feeling of their emotions pushing them to finally say what they had been holding in for what had been months. They had known each other and had been friends for over six months now. Sure, someone might say you couldn’t like someone that fast but when you spent every night together, it was easy to fall for someone and that was exactly what happened between the two of them. They had finally come to terms with their feelings for the other and no matter what happened, they had to tell one another before it was too late. For Yuto, he was scared Hongseok would miss his brother too much and want to leave before he got his chance. Hongseok thought that Yuto wouldn’t feel the same way and wanted to tell him while he still had the balls to just tell him. 

“I know it is midnight, but could we please meet up? I have something I need to tell you.” Yuto texted Hongseok before Hongseok got the chance. His heart immediately started to beat at a million miles a minute. He didn’t know what he would tell him, but he knew what he wanted to tell Yuto and no matter what news Yuto gave him, he had to be honest with him so it wouldn’t eat him up inside.   
“Sure, I will be there in fifteen.” Hongseok texted him back and he tried to clean himself up better than usual but it wasn’t much different. He just put on some nicer skinny jeans and a teal hoodie that Yuto said he liked a lot, which was odd because Yuto didn’t usually wear anything brighter than maroon, but Hongseok thought it was cute. He ruffled his hair to try to make himself look more presentable, even though it was the middle of the night. Yuto wouldn’t see him that well, but oh well. Yuto did the same thing. He dressed himself up and made himself look better than usual. For a farm boy, he cleaned up nice he joked with himself, even though he was nervous as hell. He wished Akari was here, but he shook the thought away. He grabbed his keys and got his old pick up, driving to their spot. 

Luckily he got there before Hongseok did. He was nervous as hell, but he had to tell him. He was going to sound stupid, probably. He didn’t have his words together. He couldn’t think of what he wanted to say. He hoped that when he saw Hongseok, his words would just flow out like he wanted them to. He was so nervous. What if Hongseok didn’t feel that way and Yuto was reading the messages all wrong? There was no way and Yuto was just over thinking. He glanced up into the sky, saying a little silent prayer.   
“Come on stars, you made us cross paths for a reason, help me out here.” He whispered up into the sky. He probably looked ridiculous, but he didn’t care. As soon as he did that, he heard rustling of the bushes and he looked up when he saw Hongseok. He smiled immediately at him, especially when he saw him in that teal hoodie he loved so much. Hongseok returned his smile, walking right up to him and giving him a hug. Hongseok was about to go sit on the rock and have Yuto join him, but he instead grabbed his hand.

“Hongseok…. If I don’t tell you this now, I might not get the chance or grow the balls to tell you, so I need to tell you now. I had this whole thing planned out, but we both know that I am not always great with words and I am not the best at making plans.” He laughs lightly, but then looks right back up at Hongseok seriously. “Ever since the day that I met you up here in this very spot, I knew you would be special to me. Never in my life did I ever feel so comfortable with someone and feel so content talking to someone, and you were a complete stranger at that time. And as time went on, these last few months, I have told you things I wouldn’t dare tell anyone and you did the same with me. I was so scared to let myself admit it, so scared to let myself admit my sexuality. But I didn’t have to hide it from you. I wasn’t scared to let myself admit it to you. I have never felt more comfortable and safe and happy with someone before in my whole life. You make me so happy. You always make me feel important. No matter what, you never judge me and you never make me feel less than. You really showed me that there are still people in the world that care about me and don’t just want things from me. This is going all over the place, but what I am trying to tell you is that I like you. I like you a lot, and not just as a friend. It has exceeded that limit now. I really do have feelings for you, Seok. I didn’t want to tell you in case you didn’t feel the same way, but I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I’ve never felt like this about anyone, I truly have feelings for you. No one has ever made me happy the way you do, and even if you don’t want this, if you just want to stay friends, I will completely understand. As long as I have you in my life, that is all that matters. I don’t want to lose you. But if I didn’t say that now, then, I might not.” Yuto finally finishes, staring at Hongseok trying to read the look in his eyes. 

Hongseok didn’t know what to say. He listened to every single word that Yuto had said and he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Yuto felt the same way this whole time and didn’t say anything until now? He didn’t think Yuto felt the same way, he always thought he was just joking around with him, but when he admitted it, something struck Hongseok. His heart was beating like it never had in his entire life. He was speechless for once, and he just stared at Yuto. Of course, that looked like a bad thing to Yuto who was slowly losing hope. He was about to drop Hongseok’s hands after a moment, but Hongseok tightened his grip and stepped closer to Yuto. 

“You big idiot.” He mumbled and stared at the slightly taller boy, laughing softly. “Have you not noticed that I have been flirting with you for like three months now?” He shook his head and he didn’t even bother to hide the few tears that were forming in his eyes now. “I wanted to tell you the same thing tonight. I couldn’t hold it anymore. You make me so happy. I have never wanted to be with someone in my life, too scared to let go and be myself. I have always been a shell of myself, a shadow behind my brother, but with you I never felt like I had to do that. I felt comfortable and that I could be myself 100%. You made me feel safe and made me feel like I didn’t have to be scared. You make my heart so happy and having you in my life is the only thing I need to be happy, no matter what happens. No matter what happened in my life, you were always there. I wanted you to be there either way, but I prayed that maybe one day the universe could bring us together like this and we could be more than friends. No matter what, you have never left my side and I really think you’re my person.” Hongseok finishes, a few tears falling from his eyes and now Yuto’s as well. 

“You big cheeseball.” Yuto mumbles and steps closer to him. “How did I know you would somehow make this cheesy?” He jokes and Hongseok laughs, nudging him a little with his shoulder. Both of them laugh for a moment before staring at one another. “I guess the universe really did hear me this time, and the stars finally crossed our paths together how I have been waiting for them to.” Yuto whispers, leaning his forehead onto Hongseok’s. 

Hongseok couldn’t help his smile and he closed his eyes for a moment, just taking in everything that was happening. This was surreal, the feeling he was experiencing could only be described as out of body. He never felt like this, but he could get used to it. After a moment, he finally let go of Yuto’s hands and they stared into each other’s eyes once again. Both boys smiled at one another under the bright moonlight. 

“You’re so handsome.” Yuto whispers to Hongseok who just smiles and sighs happily.   
“And you’re so beautiful, inside and out.” Yuto smiles and stares.   
“Can I ask you something?” Hongseok nods, awaiting Yuto’s question.   
“Will you be my boyfriend?” Hongseok laughs and looks up at Yuto with a dumb, goofy grin on his face as he askes.   
“Of course I will, you big dork.” He whispers, smiling at Yuto.   
“And I have a question for you.” Yuto gives him an amused expression but nods either way. Hongseok moves his hands so they can cup Yuto’s face and he looks him right in the eyes.   
“Can I kiss you finally?” Yuto laughs softly and nods happily.   
“I have been waiting for you to ask that for a while now, so of course you can.” Yuto whispers. Hongseok wasn’t sure why he felt a bit nervous, but as soon as he leaned up slowly and pressed his lips up against Yuto’s, all of that nervousness went away instantly. He held Yuto’s cheeks in his hands and the kiss that they shared was slow, soft, but it had so much emotion in it. Yuto moved his hands to Hongseok’s waist and he held him tighter to him. After a moment, they finally pulled away and both of them were grinning like never before. 

“Wow… I didn’t think it was going to be like that.” Yuto whispers and Hongseok laughs at him.  
“Is that a good thing or a bad thing, huh Adachi?” He jokes but it was all out of love.   
“Good, definitely good. The best thing, actually. I am sure I am going to love doing that about a hundred more times.” Hongseok blushed a little and nudged him.   
“Stop making me blush you goofball.” Yuto smiled at the effect he had on his best friend who was now his boyfriend. 

After a moment of teasing one another, Yuto pulled Hongseok into his arms like he had done so many times before and he just held him there. Hongseok put his arms around Yuto’s torso and laid his head on his shoulder. They stood there that way for what seemed like forever, but they were so content and they felt so much love for another. They knew that no matter what happened, they would always have one another and it would be okay. No matter what life threw their way, they would be together and get through it together, as a couple. 

“Hongseok?” Yuto finally whispered after a while of content silence.   
“Yeah, Yuto?” He asked, looking up at him with a loving gaze.   
“I was going to wait to tell you this, but, now is as good a time as ever. Both of the people we were relying on and staying here for are gone now. And I know this might be quick and the timing might be wrong, but I don’t want to stay here anymore. And well, my dad owned some land and he left it to me before he died. I didn’t tell my mom because she would have just… done who knows and she didn’t deserve it. Now that my sister is gone, and your brother is gone, we don’t have to stay here anymore. I have some money saved up to get us there and I can find a job pretty quickly and I just…” He pauses and looks up at Hongseok. “I just want to be with you, away from here, away from this shitty town and these shitty people. I want a new start with you, I really do. And if you would, I promise I will take care of you.” Hongseok could feel more tears well up in his eyes and he couldn’t even find words to say. He just nodded and smiled up at his boyfriend.   
“Of course I’ll go with you. I would go anywhere with you, Yuto.” He whispers and smiles his bright smile that Yuto had come to love so much, that was his favorite sight in the whole world. 

Yuto smiled widely and hugged Hongseok as tightly as he possibly could, picking him up and just holding onto him as tightly as possible. This was what they had been waiting for. Sure, it might have been quick. Maybe it was too fast to some people that they were already moving somewhere together, but they knew what they had was special. They knew what they had wasn’t going away. They loved one another and they would walk to the ends of the earth for one another. They were going to get out of their shitty lives and start a new one together. No matter what, they were going to be together and start fresh. 

The stars crossed their paths at just the right time and brought two hearts together. They were the prime example of star crossed lovers; and they would not have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well this is the ending of my short story! I hope that you have enjoyed reading it because I enjoyed writing it. It wasn't my best, but I am happy with how it turned out and how it is written. I liked this idea and I am glad that I got to write it. thank you for reading and I look forward to any comments you may have!


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